Healing for the Best Version of Me

How God’s Grace Transformed My Heart for Motherhood 🌻

Hey, sweet girls—

There’s something I want to share with you, something I’ve learned through my own journey of being your mom. For a long time, I didn’t realize that the best version of me—the mom you both deserve—could only happen if I let God heal the most wounded parts of me.

Motherhood has a way of showing you who you really are, and sometimes, that reflection isn’t easy to face. It revealed parts of me I didn’t like and stretched me in ways I never saw coming. My nervous system often felt overloaded, and there were moments I wasn’t proud of how I handled it all.

Living with CPTSD, anxiety, and possibly ADHD, I’ve come to understand why some of those moments felt so overwhelming. ADHD isn’t just about forgetting things or being late. It’s about having a brain that feels like it’s on a rollercoaster of emotions and focus, trying to juggle so much at once. When I get triggered, my brain’s fear center—the amygdala—kicks into high gear, and the part that helps me stay calm and make good decisions sometimes shuts down. Anxiety adds to that, making me feel like I’m carrying a heavy weight of “what-ifs” and worst-case scenarios.

For years, I didn’t understand how these things were affecting me, and honestly, I hated the parts of myself that felt broken. But here’s what I’ve learned: self-hate makes it impossible to truly love others. When Jesus said, “Love your neighbor as yourself,” He wasn’t just talking about kindness. He was showing us that loving others starts with letting Him heal the broken places in us.

When I finally let God into those deep, wounded spaces, everything started to change. Healing my heart and my nervous system didn’t just help me—it made me the mom I’ve always wanted to be for you. I could show up with more patience, more love, and more joy, because His healing made room for those things to grow in me.

God has also shown me that what might feel like weaknesses—CPTSD, anxiety, ADHD—are also gifts in their own way. They’ve taught me resilience, empathy, and creativity. They’ve helped me see the world differently, which means I can understand and support you better, too.

Here’s what I want you to know: if you ever feel overwhelmed by life or like your emotions are too much to handle, don’t hide them. Let God into those hard places. He loves you too much to leave you there. He’s always working to heal, grow, and strengthen you, just like He’s doing for me.

And through it all, remember this: you’re the reason I keep leaning into His grace every single day. You are my greatest gifts, and I’ll never stop striving to be the mom God has called me to be—for you.

Love you always,
Mom 🌻